words are poison darts of pleasure

"tell me, are you a christian, child?" "ma'am i am tonight"

2008-03-08T22:59:00.003-05:00

it's been so long since i've signed into blogger that i've completely forgotten my login information. i checked the links to your right and most everyone abandoned their blogs long ago. i'm not sure that i'm back.

my nails are painted a golden olive green today - opi's 'at your quebec and call.' it's my ode to march in boston - grey, misty, blustery, and cold. slightly more promising than the depths of 'russian navy' in january, but showing grime none the less. it'll be a good day when i can wear 'a little less conversation' with a sly grin and a raised eyebrow.

the scorecard

2007-03-25T11:49:00.000-04:00

Columbia - accepted
University of Pennsylvania - accepted
MIT - accepted
Harvard - waitlisted (grrrr)

for the last three weeks i've been praying to the grad school gods, stalking our postman, checking my email every 20 seconds, forcing michael to stay home and stalk the postman when i couldn't... for the last week, i've been moaning how it will never be over, i'll never know if schools want me, i'll probably get rejected by the remaining ones, whine whine whine.

and now, it's over. well, mostly over. there's that pesky waitlist thing.

i can breathe, right? i've got letters in front of me, fellowship offers, plane tickets purchased for open houses, decisions to make, right?

there was a brief moment of calm yesterday, but the flurry of anxiety is back in full force today. don't get me wrong, it's a GOOD anxiety, but i'm on the cusp of so many changes, so many things i've worked hard for are in my grasp. I ACTUALLY GOT ACCEPTED TO SCHOOLS. i don't think that part has even sunk in yet.

it's all fun and games until...

2006-09-11T16:16:00.000-04:00

it's easy to forget that i live in someone's basement.

though natural light isn't abundant (we're not talking about 8th floor north facing floor-ceiling windows anymore), there are light fixtures-a-plenty, windows that can be opened for ventilation, and a massive 11ftx30ft living space which isn't well described by 'damp, dark, or dank.' so, like i said, it's easy to forget that i live in someone's basement.

that is, until i get bit on the neck by one of the hundreds of spiders that ALSO call my basement home.

the perfect cappuccino

2006-08-20T16:49:00.000-04:00

needed:
several year-old 4-shot espresso maker handed down from father, barely used
small frothing pitcher (ikea, $2)
coffee mug (the bigger, the better)
spoon
freshly ground espresso (enough to fill the grounds holder)
2 teaspoons sugar
1/4 cup milk
cinnamon

instructions:
fill decanter with water
add espresso grounds as directed
begin brewing espresso as directed

pour milk into frothing pitcher
dissolve very small amount of sugar (1/4 teaspoon) into milk - this gives the froth a very subtle sweet flavor
froth milk as directed

pour espresso (ALL OF IT!) into coffee cup, dissolve remainder of sugar into espresso
using a spoon to hold back the froth, pour in unfrothed milk
top with froth
sprinkle just a DASH of cinnamon on top

repeat several times/day.

tense miles for the girls in underware

2006-07-21T16:03:00.000-04:00

i can't stop listening to this cd (the figurines : skeleton). it's really not even that good. i mean, it's catchy, but once i wear it out, it'll join the ranks of the apples in stereo and the olivia tremor control as simply a shortlived obsession.

have had friends in town for the last week, including two separate overnight guests. i've been wonderfully out of character, going out to bars almost every night until closing, having a tremendously fun time, and still making it into work on time! there's something so wonderful about laughing until you're crying and can hardly breathe.

the figurines . ambush

heard around the house

2006-07-18T21:16:00.000-04:00

"what would you say is the average number of pages used in these sketchbooks?"

"what would you say is the average number of times i want to punch you the face each day?"

all these love songs, and where the hell are you, my dear?

2006-06-29T01:30:00.000-04:00

i've been reminded lately of those few people in this world that i feel an explicable, innate connection to. how do you explain it, really? there are times when you meet someone, and despite the relatively small amount of time you spend with them, you forever feel connected to them.

i lived with jessica for a summer, and she was my successor as aias president at the u of a. i guess the first time we really spent time together was in DC during the summer of 2001 - we mostly ditched the conference to spend time around DC, hanging out in the museums and meeting more interesting people than we thought we could meet at the conference (i'm perfectly aware of the irony here, don't worry). the summer after that, we lived together in clarendon, giving design advice to the city and the mayor that unknowingly presented us with homemade porn instead of movies about the once beautiful city (sam will no doubt remember this, as well, since we gave him the task of returning the film to the mayor). i remember hanging out with the boys from k-state in dc (though i can't, for the life of me, remember their names), one of them photographing her at every available opportunity, and me thinking, for the moment, how incredibly beautiful she was.

and then there's natalie. i don't really remember how my connection formed with natalie - i think she was in first year, and i was in third year, i guess as aias pres, but i can't really remember when we started talking. it was one of those weird things - one of those situations where you meet someone and you can talk about the most obscure things, reference something that happened many years ago, and they totally GET IT. you don't need words or situations or circumstances to understand each other; it's just there. i can call natalie tonight, ask her to pick me up from the airport, and she's THERE (though admittedly, it's harder from dubai than it is from fayetteville). and, last year, i was on a jury that was selecting scholarship applications, and i came across nat's, and i was reminded of how incredible she is. speaking many languages, background all over the middle east, some of the most beautiful artwork i've ever seen, and thinking, for the moment, how incredibly beautiful she is.

and then there's neil. neil was my high school sweetheart, i suppose. but like
things in high school, our relationship was mostly superficial and terse (though not in duration). and like most high school relationships, there were things about it that really stung and things about it that were really sacred. and while i can dwell on that all night (and believe me, i could), what really strikes me are the stories i've heard over time - small tidbits about interests and actions and studies and understanding that while we "grew up" during college very far apart, we really grew up together. i feel like that no matter where we are, we really aren't that far apart.

and tonight i had dinner with the mayors of jessica's adopted hometowns (portland and eugene), and i've been sending music to nat as a new resident of dubai, and i recently rediscovered neil on myspace (or he rediscovered me, whatever), and i feel so incredibly connected to them, no matter what the distance entails.

but then there are those friends who are THERE, those that maybe you "forget" to feel that innate connection to, because you talk to them every single day. they are the murrye's and the michael's of your friends - the ones you know you can forever count on.

murrye has watched me grow so tremendously over the last several years. perhaps at a distance at first, but by the time we were in 5th year, we were absolutely inseperable. i remember the very, very first day of architecture school, when laura said "take a look around, because these are the people that are going to be in your wedding." sure enough, carrie and murrye were my bridesmaids and luke was an usher in my wedding.

but murrye has evolved from a close confidant to my very best friend. during the last three years, there has been no one, and i mean no one, that has provided me with the insight, courage, and inspiration on a daily basis that murrye does. to be cliche, murrye has seen me at my very best and my very worst, and she always looks out for *me*, moreso than the situations i get myself into. and over the last 3 years, i've watched her grow tremendously. she's went from a phenomenal designer and artist (which she is) to this beautiful, confident person that knows no boundaries. it's hard being best-friends with a drop-dead beauty (which she also is), but it's much easier being best-friends with an incredibly beautiful person that will always be so, even when she stops being telegenic (though i've seen her mother, her physical looks will never disappear).

and then there's michael, the love of my life. i can't seem to talk about him without recalling cheesy thoughts of bad poetry. just a few nights ago, he wrote me an email, recalling some early love letters he wrote me (he's packing up our apartment, remember?), asking me to please not "roll my eyes" at him. that really about sums it up - anything i could tell you about our love would probably make your eyes roll. but, after 7 years, i'm still completely fascinated and intrigued by him, and the fact that we finish each other's sentences only adds to that. we have this understanding of each other that completely transcends whatever it is that we do on a daily basis, and i feel lucky to have found this person when i did.

so where does that leave us? i think it leaves me incredibly rich, with a multitude of people i can reach out to all over the world. it also leaves me a little baffled - how can you ever know the impression that you make on someone else?

"no comment"

2006-06-29T01:26:00.000-04:00

like i said, it's a really tough life.

2006-06-26T00:29:00.000-04:00

in a week, i will make it; i will make it forever

2006-06-25T10:42:00.000-04:00

we're moving much sooner than expected - we thought we were going to have a month overlap (which, yes, means that we would have to pay rent twice), but, on a whim, we decided to try to find a subletter (subleasee?). within an hour of posting the apartment on craigslist, we had people offering to pay more for the apartment than we'd offered. who would want an expensive, unfurnished apartment for a month? lawyers, my friend. lawyers.

so we're moving next saturday, and, unfortunately (HA!), i'm walking out the door right now for a business trip in san francisco. not only will i not get back until friday night, but i have to stay in this awful hotel with these awful amenities. please feel sorry for me. don't feel sorry for michael at all. it's not like he has to pack EVERYTHING all by himself.

the figurines . the wonder

my favorite meditation

2006-06-21T20:57:00.000-04:00

one foot follows after the other - a crowded dc sidewalk, but there are only shoes. icelandic dribble builds, not sure if it's instrument or voice, language or animal musings. slow, deep calculated breaths to a count of eight, markings on the sidewalk become the space between my thoughts.

sigur ros . svefn g englar

the end of an era

2006-06-16T22:03:00.000-04:00

two weeks ago, michael and i began the bittersweet journey of leaving the first place we called home together.

moving is alot like exercising - you know you want to do it, you sort of look forward to it and dread it at the same time, you ask yourself why you would ever want to go through it while you're in the middle of it, and you feel great about it when you're done. and if you do it right, you might even be a little lighter at the end of the process.

the first step of the process: repainting the beautiful orange ceiling.

leaving for a bit...

2006-06-07T22:42:00.000-04:00

going to los angeles for a few days, but when i get back, i promise my hiatus will be over. and i might even bring back some exciting news!

3rd time is a charm?

2006-05-11T21:28:00.000-04:00

why do we put so much stock in "important dates?" birthdays, anniversaries, holidays, they're really just days, right? then why do we insist on attaching meaning to them? are we just setting ourselves up for disappointment?

when michael and i got married, we were too busy and too broke to go on a honeymoon. there's no way i could have fit a wedding, a college graduation, a move to DC, AND a honeymoon into a week*. three of those were enough, thank you.

for our one-year anniversary, we took a 10-day trip to costa rica. thanks to my airline miles and supreme backpacking skills honed in the hostels of europe**, we were able to do the entire trip for a little over $1000 (that's right. i'm totally bragging about this). we spent the first half hiking in the cloud forest and the second half on the beach, in a little bungalow about 40 feet from the water's edge (pictures avail at flickr). on the day of our anniversary, we decided to kayak out to an island, and, barring one layer of sunscreen and our measly swimsuits, we were naked to the sun. we paid for it by not being able to move for the remainder of the trip and comparing the size of skin sheets peeling off in the weeks to come.

anniversary #1 = SUCKED***.

fastforward a year. imagine this - we're broke again****. and we're not in costa rica. this is shaping up to be a real winner of an anniversary already, isn't it? we'd already decided not to do anything special - we went to nyc a few weeks ago and we were "counting" that as our anniversary trip*****. michael was working on this massive project for school, one that required the help of his research partners (the german and the social guy). upon my insistence, they decided to have a little "coding party" at our apartment on our anniversary. you know, so they could geek out and get some work done. cool by me, i can dig it. they're supposed to show up at 2:00. nothing. 2:30, social guy calls "i'm running a little late." 3:45, social guy shows up, still no word from the german. i decide to go for a run, my "usual" saturday 6-miler. get about 4 miles into it and i feel like i'm about to die. not from running, just hot and cold and tired and achy. get home, shower, get dressed again (the german has made his unexplained but expected fashionably late appearance), still feel like i'm about to die. running 100.0 fever. perfect. 7:00, the german is hungry. 7:30 the four of us are celebrating our second anniversary at a small italian restaurant nearby. perfect. social guy makes a sweet toast and follows it up by lamenting how difficult it is to keep the excitement in a relationship after "that long******." 9:30, back at the apartment. 9:35 THEY KEEP CODING. WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE? 10:00, my dad calls, wishing us a happy anniversary. i complain loudly that we're not alone. and that i'm running a fever. 11:30, after shooting many, many evil eyes******* and catching up on ALL of my old new yorkers, they leave. finally.

anniversary #2 = SUCKED.

*and rebeading my wedding dress and finishing a final, don't forget those either.
** that's technically not true. i only stayed in a hostel once, when i was on a weekend trip by myself to ravenna.
*** again, not completely true. we WERE in costa rica, and there was plenty of beer.
**** we're technically not broke. i sorta messed up something on our taxes that has placed us in a temporarily inconvenient position.
***** much in the same way michael's valentine's day ipod will also be his birthday ipod and his christmas ipod
****** i would comment here, but i'm going to take the unusual route of censoring my response to save my father an early heart attack.
******* a look michael is very familiar with. something like this:

ipod shuffle, pt 1

2006-05-05T11:35:00.000-04:00

i recently read mary gaitskill's latest novel Veronica. it's a good book, a convincing dialog about perceptions of and struggles with beauty and friendship, but that's not really struck me about it. throughout the novel, the main character, influenced heavily by her misunderstood father, has a running soundtrack. every commentary and situation is linked back to a song, a set of lyrics. i find this happening often in my own life, certainly aided by the white headphones pumping music into my ears most of the time.

tuesday, dooce published an interesting exercise on alpha mom, an exercise which i'm about to blatantly copy.

let's explore this running soundtrack of my life, part one. here's what we're going to do: set my ipod on shuffle (i, unlike dooce, ADORE the shuffle function on my ipod) and comment on the first 10 songs that play.

but, there is a groundrule: i can skip songs that i don't want to comment on, but i have to tell you that i'm skipping them.

also: sometimes my ipod contains, uh, embarrasing music. i have guilty pleasures, ok? also, my boss regularly feeds me new music (sucks, i know), and i've got over 2,000 songs on my ipod, some of which (ok, alot of which), i haven't really listened to much. i have a feeling that the songs i skip will be as embarrasing as the songs in my collection that i consider 'embarrasing,' but for completely different reasons.

alright, let's go:

stay don't go . spoon . kill the moonlight
no comment.

3rd planet . modest mouse . the moon and antartica
this song brings me back to my days working at toys r us in college. i saw modest mouse several times in fayetteville, but it was all pre-moon and antartica. i used to drive to and from work imaging myself performing this song live. i do that alot. i wish i were a rock star. favorite lyrics:

your heart felt good it was drippin pitch and made of wood
and your hands and knees felt cold and wet on the grass to me
outside naked, shiverin looking blue, from the cold
sunlight that’s reflected off the moon

the power is on . the go! team . thunder, lightening, strike
no comment

i'm on your side . the magic magicians . girls
i picked up this cd when i was living in wicker park in chicago (before urban outfitters came) at a little music store where it was listed as a staff favorite. i never really fell in love with them, but this cd always reminds me of being in chicago. favorite lyrics:

and you said what we always kinda knew
but i don't have a clue
and you talk until your face is blue
but you don't have a clue

get gone . fiona apple . when the pawn
ahhh... one of those slightly embarrasing songs, but i really like this one. there's something jazzy and fun and empowering about it. favorite lyrics:

how many times can it escalate
'till it elevates to a place I can't breathe?
and I must decide, if you must deride
that I'm much obliged to up and go

black math . the white stripes . elephant
no comment

creme brulee . sonic youth . dirty
no comment

frank sinatra . cake . fashion nugget
another slightly embarrasing song. i think my ipod is out to get me. i bought this cd in high school, shortly after meeting some internet friends in magnolia. andy - in his green avenger - would play 'the distance' over and over again and i totally associated it with the freedom of finally having my driver's license. favorite lyrics:

an old man sits collecting stamps
in a room all filled with Chinese lamps
he saves what others throw away
he says that he'll be rich someday

hag . the breeders . last splash
no comment. other than the breeders played at the first show i ever saw at the bowery ballroom in nyc.

neighborhood #3 (power out) . the arcade fire . funeral
no comment. though i do like this song.

whaddit i done . animal collective . sung tongs
no comment. though i did meet brian's (from the band) uncle on a plane ride to savannah once.

stadiums and shrines II . sunset rubdown . shut up i am dreaming
no comment. looks like i'm commenting anyway? i just got this cd, so i haven't had time to develop any connections to it.

and then patterns . four tet . everything ecstatic
no comment

the state that i am in . belle & sebastian . tigermilk
*sigh* one of my favorite belle and sebastian songs. the lyrics are alright, mostly i just like the melody. and stuart murdoch's voice. dreamy. belle and sebastian were one of the first indie bands i really got into. i used to listen to 'if you're feeling sinister' over and over again in studio. favorite lyrics:

the priest in the booth had a photographic memory
for all he had heard
he took all of my sins and he wrote a pocket novel called
the state I am in

hands away . interpol . turn on the bright lights
there's something about this song that's incredibly beautiful and haunting. turn on the bright lights might very well be my favorite cd of all time (i blogged about my relationship with it here), though it has some competition. this song makes me want to sit between my bed and my big sunroom window on a cold rainy night wrapped up on in a blanket. in a good way. favorite lyrics:

home spun desperation's knowing
inside your cover's always blown

tired of sex . weezer . pinkerton
*groan* this song should really be banned from my ipod. a certain-unnamed high school boyfriend of mine used to listen to this cd all the time - it's a great cd, one that i still have a fondness for. but he used to sing this damn song all the time, thinking in his head of all the girls names and how they related to girls he knew, no doubt fantasizing about all of them. then he just started doing it to annoy me. i think we spent alot of our relationship trying to annoy each other. favorite lyrics:

none. i hate this song.

riot van . arctic monkeys . whatever people say
no comment

song for myla goldberg . the decemberists . her majesty
the decemberists are relatively new to my 'most played' list, but there's something that really draws me to this song. i think it's the cheesy reference to new york. the lyrics aren't that great, but the delivery is deadpan - hurried, longing, distant. it's become a regular on my rotation. favorite lyrics:

listen in as shin-kicked Jim relates his story sad
about a boy who kicked until his shins were all but rubberbands
but now
i know New York i need New York
i know I need unique New York

across the river . lucero . that much further west
if you know lucero, you can't help but to love them. and if you know them, you probably know them live. which means you know ben nichols and his arkansas tatoo, and when you watch him sing, you wish he was singing about you. favorite lyrics:

across the river you can dance all night
a pretty little girl that I left behind
i know you're not waiting on me
look at you girl you're just skin and bones
you're breaking all the hearts of the boys back home
and I know you're not waiting on me

weight of the world . tarkio . sea songs for landlord
no comment. though i do like this song. mostly i only listen to it when my itunes goes past tapes 'n tapes and i don't notice

ready to die . the unicorns . who will cut our hair
no comment

william's alabama . shannon wright . flightsafety
few artists have resonated with me in the way that shannon wright has. from the first time i heard flightsafety, i had this indescribable attachment to her and her throaty voice. she played chicago often the summer that i lived there - always at the empty bottle, which was 21+ (i was 20). by all accounts she's incredible live, even if she hates playing live shows (she plays all of the instruments in this cd), but i never did get to see it. the first time i was in the netherlands, walking around freezing to the bone, looking for a place to stop in and warm up, i turned the corner to see the saloon sign and streetscape that graces the front of this cd. i took a picture of it, and of course lost it. damn. favorite lyrics:

he turned the light out
he turned the sun down
farewell, goodnight
the awning falls flat and the clocks are spinning
bowl the town for alcohol
you are what i need

ten tons against me and you've gone

2006-05-02T15:25:00.000-04:00

i've spent the last little while in a fog. not sure what it was exactly - a mixture of many things, for sure. but it's a new week, a new month, almost a new year in my marriage - it's time to turn over a new leaf.

*i'm actually linking the music today. i'll go back soon and fix the recent links

the wrens . she sends kisses

Your Lucky Underwear is Orange

2006-05-01T12:19:00.000-04:00

You have an intense personality and crave extreme emotional experiences. And your lucky orange underwear will help you take it to a whole new level.

Adventure and danger don't phase you - in fact you enjoy dicey situations. You're the first to take a risk, and the first to get the payoff.

And while your risks sometimes result in great rewards, they also sometimes result in devastating failures.

If you want to have intense moments without always risking all you have, put on your orange underpants. They'll help you experience life with rich emotions, no matter what you're doing.

What Color Is Your Lucky Underwear?

we should never get so sentimental

2006-04-20T11:41:00.000-04:00

so, back in feb i wrote about our event at work that resulted in a photoshoot for vanity fair. the whole thing was a big surprise, really. we went down to miami a few days before the event to make sure everything was in order - that all of our locations were secure, catering was handled, etc. one of our mayors was bringing his security detail so we had more than usual to coordinate. the day before the event began, we were cabbing around the city, going back and forth between venues, fielding calls from mayors and their offices, when we get a call from our primary meeting location. "do you know anything about a vanity fair photoshoot taking place here tomorrow?" "ummm. no. they're shooting the mayors? during our event?" call miami city hall. "oh yea, vanity fair wants to shoot diaz, daley, and o'malley for their green issue in may. they'll be doing it in the morning before the session" "ok. great."

the issue is out - i'm still not sure why vanity fair is getting into the business of activism - and the mayors look great. but see if you notice the problem here:

from the photoshoot:

from vanity fair:

nice photoshop work, guys.

clap your hands say yeah! . cigarettes

i could take away the salt from your eyes

2006-04-20T11:22:00.000-04:00

wolf parade at the black cat last week. for once, i wasn't caught between crazy girl and crazy dancing girl - i was actually on the front row, thanks to some nice, tall, considerate gentlemen who let me stand in front of them. michael had to stay back, but he's used to looking at the back of my head anyway =)

wolf parade . i'll believe in anything

i can't pretend i don't need to defend some part of me from you

2006-04-07T19:50:00.000-04:00

as usual, let's insert my enormous foot into my mouth. let's insert it once, take it out, and insert it again, this time so deep that i can pull it out of my ass.

a few days after writing the previous entry, i go and join myspace, only to be tracked down by several of my former high school classmates. you know, right after that entry about my theoretical high school reunion.

foot.in.mouth.hard.to.breathe.someone.get.this.thing.out.

fuck it man, i'm going to new york.

interpol . the new

you look a bit like coffee, and you taste a little like me

2006-03-27T12:21:00.000-05:00

what is it about reunions? people either seem to love them or hate them, and the people who hate them are generally the ones who don't want to see the people who love them. does the desire to participate change with age and distance?

i have no desire to go to my high school reunion. i graduated with about 400 other people, and i still see the ones that i care to keep in touch with. i've changed alot since high school, but i know seeing the majority of the people i graduated with will bring out the old me. i'll instantly go back to feeling like i'm 14 and need the validation from the world i lived just outside of. my ultra-competitive instincts will kick in, and i won't even want to be around myself. i was always different, and i simultaneously hated and embraced that fact. i'm not sure what the difference was exactly, but i knew it was rooted in the fact that i'd be leaving arkansas as soon as i could and that i'd never look back.

of course, i didn't leave arkansas as soon as i could - i instead spent 5 years in college at fayetteville. i've written about my love/hate relationship with that decision, but at the end of the day, i wouldn't trade it for anything. i made some of the best friends of my life, i grew more than i ever thought possible, and in the walls of vol walker hall, late at night, while working on architecture projects with people who cared as much about it as i did, i discovered that i really wasn't that different - there are people everywhere who embrace their passions and get swept up in them. and i didn't need to leave arkansas to figure that out.

and so i'm going to a reunion of sorts this weekend. i'll be back in fayetteville with a good chunk of my architecture classmates, and there is no dread what-so-ever involved. i can't wait to see these people - the same people who have seen some of my worst moments and some of my best, who backpacked italy and the netherlands with me and made late night trips to the ER with me for exacto accidents (or at least were waiting to see the stiches when i got back). and while we may be jaded by the realities of internship and may not be as idealistic as we were when we all came together in second year, i still hold a sense of optimism for what these guys will accomplish during their careers. but, more than anything, i'm just looking forward to having a few beers and laughs with them.

clap your hands say yeah . skin of my yellow country teeth

i'll be excited for a week, but then excitement starts to fade

2006-03-07T15:35:00.000-05:00

i have a love/hate relationship with going to shows. i get so pumped about them when i first see the announcement on the calendar. i rush to buy tickets, scared the show will sell-out and that i'll miss out on something great. weeks come and go, and it's finally time to go to the show. i'll spend the day listening to the band, getting pumped, getting ready. come about an hour before the show, i always question if i *really* want to go (one time this questioning turned disasterous. not only did michael and i miss the last modest mouse show in fayetteville, but we ended up with a cat). i mean, i'll be up late, have to transport myself to and from the venue, yadda yadda. usually end up going (except for that time with the cat. argh), get there early to get a good spot because I'm the SHORTEST PERSON IN THE WORLD and if someone, anyone, is in front of me, i can't see a thing. so i wait. and wait. the band is never on time. and i wait. then they start. all of a sudden i discover i'm smack inbetween crazy-dancing-girl and crazy-dancing-girl-with-an-attitude. EVERYTIME. and they're bigger than me. but my elbows are effective. usually. which brings me to this - i'm going to tell you a big secret: there's an unwritten rule at indie concerts: YOU DON'T DANCE. NO DANCING. if whatever you're doing requires you to have enough space for 2 people, YOU ARE ANNOYING EVERYONE AROUND YOU. stop it. despite said people, i always end up having a great time, screaming with everyone else in the end for an encore. and the best part: the post-concert buzz. i spend the entire next day listening to the band, reminiscing about the show, and hearing songs in totally new ways. i can't stop.

and thanks to npr, i can actually LISTEN to the belle and sebastian/new pornographers show from last night online. check it out. my favorite part? around minute 37 when they play "the blues are still blue" followed by "piazza new york catcher." worth the price of the ticket right there.

belle and sebastian . the blues are still blue

i could live on words and dreams and a million screams

2006-03-05T16:29:00.000-05:00

week of concerts (part 1):

belle and sebastian
the new pornographers
clap your hands say yeah

AND WE'VE GOT TICKETS FOR THEM ALL!

weezer . across the sea

it's gonna kill when you desert me

2006-03-03T12:55:00.000-05:00

i've debated how much to talk about my job on my blog for a long time. on one hand, it's really stupid, and many people have gotten fired for it. on the other hand, i love my job and only have about 5 regular readers (most of whom are family). what harm can it do, right?

as i've mentioned previously, i work for a group that educates mayors about city design. in the time that i started working there, we've worked in the gulf coast and new orleans, with university presidents and mayors of those cities, and last week we worked with some REALLY big city mayors in miami. this miami event was the first that i've planned start-to-finish, and the payoff was phenomenal.

a big highlight? the vanity fair photoshoot! check out the pics at flickr... i think the photos will be in the may issue.

weezer . why bother

we're all we've got and we don't want to be alone

2006-02-19T20:13:00.000-05:00

from thursday's new york times, an article on/interview with weezer's rivers cuomo:

"...I'm not much of a 'misser' in general. I love whatever I'm doing at the moment and completely forget what I was doing before."

that's beautiful. i'm not going to be a misser anymore.

weezer . no other one

this is beginning to hurt

2006-02-18T17:47:00.000-05:00

it's so easy to say 'i hate this, i hate that, i hate that.'

in the indie rock community, it's so uncool to like anything remotely mainstream.

in politics, it's so easy to discredit anything the republicans want to do.

in life, it's so easy to discount others' opinions because they're different than your own.

i'm pretty cynical by nature. i've got a husband who lets this attitude fester, and i think we've even convinced ourselves that we're pretty funny while we're doing it. sometimes we are, but sometimes maybe it's just a crutch.

i really dislike the concept of valentine's day. i've always said i do, anyway. but what's there to hate, really? sure, it's alot of pressure, but instead of putting all my energy towards bitching about what a pointless holiday it is (and the fact that it isn't really a HOLIDAY since you don't get the day off work and wouldn't that make the whole thing more bearable for everyone?), maybe i should put my energy towards telling the people i care about just how much i care about them. it might just bring a tiny piece of joy to my little shriveled heart. or maybe it would just make me gag.

weezer . getchoo

tonight I'm begging you please

2006-02-12T14:00:00.000-05:00

for the last few years, i've made it a sunday ritual to check the wedding announcements in my hometown newspaper, the el dorado news times. this illustrious publication is available online (how very modern of you, el dorado), though you have to pay something outrageous like $60/year to actually view it at a readable resolution, unless you subscribe to the REAL newspaper, which i clearly don't. instead, i flip to page 18 online (somehow, it always starts on page 18), look at the pictures, and squint to try to see if i know any of the people. i'm not really sure why i do this. it's not like i CARE, and i didn't even bother to send in MY OWN wedding announcement (though you better believe i've thought about sending it in this year sometime in May saying that we were married on May 6 and just neglect to mention that it was in 2004, not 2006).

a few months ago, a friend got me hooked on the new york times sunday wedding announcements. i can't even begin to describe how much joy these bring me. i can't make it through a single one without coffee coming out of my nose from laughing so hard. they're a fabulous mix of parental boasting (even when the children are losers - though most of the time they fall into the category of ivy-league grads. which doesn't mean they aren't also losers) and obscene pretentiousness. love it, love it, love it.

if you happen to find the times wedding announcements as funny as i, you'll love this site - veiled conceit, which bills itself as "a glimpse into that haven of superficial, pretentious, pseudo-aristocratic vanity: the ny times' wedding & celebration announcements"

weezer . tired of sex

morning comes in paradise, morning comes in light

2006-02-10T10:50:00.000-05:00

i've always had these grand visions for myself. when i was young, i was going to be an olympian. standing in my front yard, practicing my backhand-springs (or flip-flops, as i normally call them), i had visions of a crowd erupting upon sticking a perfect landing. later, when i was a little more accomplished, i was watching an olympian do a pass with a flip-flop, flip-flop, back (also called a back-whipback - a backhandspring without hands. different from a back tuck), flip-flop, flip-flop, back. i immediately thought 'hey, i can do that,' and i proceeded to make my mom follow me outside in the dark to see if i could. i stuck it the first time.

i never really appreciated how much of my parent's very limited resources they put into my activities. from gymnastics to cheerleading to soccer to track to blah to blah. i always assumed the money would be there. and that i was somehow entitled to it. when i was in the 10th grade i applied to a summer chemistry program at columbia, without really telling my parents. i was exploding with excitement when i got the acceptance letter. i'd be able to spend 6 weeks living in nyc (i'd, of course, never been there), studying chemistry, getting me one step closer to my dream of attending an ivy-league school. i'll never forget the disappointment when we got the bill for $7,000, and my parents said we couldn't afford it. and i knew it was true.

same thing happened when i applied to colleges. choice A with tuition i could never afford or choice B which would pay me to go there. i picked choice B. i ended up loving it, but that twinge of regret is still there.

i've always prided myself in my ability to DO STUFF. most days i really feel like there's nothing i can't do, if i really want to do it. but other days i look at where i am now, and i have a fuzzy picture of where i want to be in the future, but it's just going to take SO LONG to get there. it feels like a massive transition period, but, really, isn't that what life is? when i reach the top, i'm sure i'll just be reaching for more. it's not healthy to say 'i'll be happy when...,' but it's really hard not to.

sufjan stevens . for the widows in paradise, for the fatherless in ypsilanti

you look like a newlywed

2006-02-02T19:07:00.000-05:00

back in october, i posted how i'd resolved to get back in shape. 3 months later, i can safely say that i'm on my way. to me, being in shape has nothing to do with weight, so we're not going to talk about that here. being in shape is more a state of mind, a state of being, a LIFESTYLE, if you will. it involves regularly going to the gym or doing physical activity, eating well, and not drinking coca-cola. 2 out of 3 ain't bad, folks.

back in october, i was still frustrated because my ankle wouldn't allow for a complete immersion in fitness. i've always been ultra-competitive, and believe me, i'm the MOST competitive with myself. the notion of 'taking it slow' or 'taking it easy' means absolutely nothing to me. i push myself harder than anyone else could push me, and i'm the hardest on myself. i would get mad, i mean MAD, when i would run a short distance only to have my ankle shoot pain up the side of my calve. poor michael had to live with this for a whole year.

sometime in december i began to make rapid progress. what started as slow one mile runs progressed into slow two mile runs and by january i'd clocked a couple of 5+ mile runs. my ankle is still consistently sore, but it's reaching the point where i'm considering not having a third surgery this summer to remove the remaining three screws (by the way, people, they're SCREWS. not pins. so stop calling them pins. there's a big difference). but we'll see.

also, in january, i joined a gym to take yoga classes. our apartment building has a gym, but it's cheaper to join a gym and take yoga than it is to just take yoga classes (and believe me, that isn't exactly cheap). so now i'm taking yoga two-to-three days a week (plus a bonus pilates class or two), and i'm practically living at the gym.

it feels fantastic.

wolf parade . grounds for divorce

ipod my baby

2006-01-20T16:57:00.000-05:00

doesn't this ALMOST make you want to have a baby?

no? doesn't it AT LEAST make you want to find someone with a baby and covertly clothe it in this and then rub its little belly until you find the song you want to listen to?

no? how about babying your ipod, instead?

you can't say no to THAT.

come to me, please, all these years fall through

2006-01-18T20:32:00.000-05:00

with a single e-mail yesterday, i'm 17 again. a know-it-all with no life experience and more aquaintances than friends. with a single phone call, i'm sitting in front of a beautiful, plain oak box scribbled with ruminations on moments lost. i can't see what's inside, but i've heard. i'm surprised there's anything left to put inside. it's covered with my contribution - purple iris flowers and yellow roses. it's not much, but all i can do. i don't remember when this conversation happened, but i know the irises are hers and the roses mine. i no longer remember the exact moment i saw her last, only when i knew i'd never see her again. i kept journals when i was around that age. those pages are stapled together, never to be opened again.

a few months before, we were visiting my friend chuck in little rock. a 16 and 17 year old on a road trip to little rock - windows down and music blaring. probably speeding and driving carelessly, but who doesn't then? we were introduced to his sister that day - elizabeth, but call me babs. driving back that afternoon, we were recalling on how many elizabeths we knew and beths and lizzys, and that's when she said, 'i think i want people to call me liz.'

drink to me, babe, then . a.c. newman

2006-01-17T13:43:00.000-05:00

i must be way off-base here. even pajiba doesn't hate it.

you're about to get taken to a dreamworld of magic

2006-01-16T16:54:00.001-05:00

has anyone else seen this movie? i never read the book as a child, so i had no expectations going into it - only that it was going to be a kid-friendly pg flick, but this has to be THE WORST movie i've seen in a LONG time. does anyone else think peter is a total prince william knock-off (imdb credits the role of peter to william moseley the first. what 19 year old goes by 'the first'? sam - did your great-grandfather go by the first?)? or that susan is a horrible actress (and doesn't she just look like a little bitch)? or that there was something REALLY innapropriate going on between lucy and tumnus? the only redeeming part of the movie was tilda swinton's dreads. rock on tilda.

the chronicles of narnia . snl short

2006-01-14T14:35:00.000-05:00

the best quote that has ever led to my blog:

"i'm not for your sex pleasure"

i can go away and you can wish that i had stayed or just stayed gone

2006-01-11T11:48:00.000-05:00

my favorite things about having the husband out of the house for a few days:

walking around the house without getting groped
sleeping with both pillows
exercising compulsively and not eating dinner until 10:00 if i want
not getting the dreaded 5:30 'when are you coming home' phone call (only dreaded if it's going to be late)
putting dishes in the dishwasher without getting groped
getting ready in the morning while listening to music (oh wait. i do that anyway)
two words: project runway
listening to the same song over and over and over again
wearing all of my favorite shirts of his at the same time if i want
getting ready in the morning without getting groped

medication . modest mouse

meet me on my vast veranda

2006-01-08T18:40:00.000-05:00

sometime over the last year and a half, i grew up. i went from the studious tomboy in a t-shirt, jeans, and sneakers (with no make-up, of course) to a young woman in tailored clothes and heels. i actually wash, dry, and style my hair daily and take the time to apply make-up. i guess most people hit this phase when they were, oh, around 13, but when i was 13 i was more interested in running faster than the boys at soccer practice than impressing them off the field. incase you're wondering, guys aren't impressed when you can run faster than them. well, not impressed in a 'man, i'd like to take her on a date' kind of way, more impressed in the 'wow, that girl is fast and makes me feel like a 13 year-old going through puberty. she sucks.' kind of way.

my transition into femininity has been a gradual one, though. first came the heels (i've always, by the way, been a shoe fanatic. even in my tomboy days, i always wore cool, funky retro sneakers), then the tailored, stylish clothes. at some point i purchased expensive make-up and began getting massages and facials. i carry purses that match my outfits (most of the time) and usually have a compact and lipstick handy. until about a month ago though, one look at my hands with their ratty fingernails and cuticles would give it all away - this chick doesn't have her act together at all. i've been a nailbiter all my life. add to that a fondness for biting cuticles, and my hands have always been a body part i prefer to keep hidden. well, as i said, that was all until about a month ago - WHEN I COLD TURKEY STOPPED BITING MY NAILS (and cuticles)! i supposed i was inspired by murrye (yet again) who came to dc with her beautiful hands and kept pulling out her cuticle cream exclaiming that her nails were wretched (which one look down at mine proved they were not). now, with my own burt's bees cuticle cream in tow, my nails and hands are smashing! and i didn't even need a new year's resolution to do it!

we both go down together . the decemberists

enough hair of the dog to make myself an entire rug

2006-01-07T16:59:00.000-05:00

ahhh... my first post of the new year. as stated in my previous post (a month ago - so sorry about that), i'm not a big new year's person. i did manage to have a little fun this year though (incriminating pictures avail at flickr) - at a rockin' new year's party at paul brown stadium in cinci. i even got to be a celebrity judge for a fashion show with cameron sinclair!

inspired by murrye (who never ceases to inspire me), i'm going to do the little 40 questions thing for 2005 now. it can't hurt, right?

1. What did you do in 2005 that you’d never done before?
traveled all over the US. negotiated a salary.

2. Did you keep your New Years’ resolutions and will you make more for next year?
i didn't make any resolutions last year, and i have no official resolutions this year

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
my sister-in-law gave birth to a beautiful baby girl, sophia.

4. Did anyone close to you die?
thankfully, not this year.

5. What countries did you visit?
the good ole usa and costa rica

6. What would you like to have in 2006 that you lacked in 2005?
more control of my finances (i should block zappos.com from my computer)

7. What date from 2005 will remain etched upon your memory?
the same date that has been etched in my memory since 1998 (but for a different reason this time) - August 29.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
finding creating ways to be involved in the architecture profession, all while knowing i will probably never be an "Architect."

9. What was your biggest failure?
hmmm... i think i'll stay mum on this one.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
recovered from my december 2004 ankle break, otherwise, nothing remarkable

11. What was the best thing you bought?
expensive make-up and brushes - it makes me feel incredibly feminine.

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
my mom's - for making several positive, life-altering decisions.

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
most of the inconsiderate pedestrians and drivers in dc. and the person that stole my bike... argh....

14. Where did most of your money go?
rent. it's depressing how much of my money goes to rent.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
my orange ceiling and by blackberry.

16. What song/album will always remind you of 2005?
leif erikson by interpol or mine's not a high horse by the shins

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
happier or sadder? about the same
thinner or fatter? about the same
richer or poorer? about the same

18. What do you wish you’d done more of?
wish i'd been better connected with old friends

19. What do you wish you’d done less of?
eating out and watching television

20. How did you spend Christmas?
with my husband's extended family... it's been awhile since i've been with mine on christmas day

21. Who did you spend the most time on the phone with?
talking to or text messaging? i'm not a huge phone talker.

22. Did you fall in love in 2005?
not exactly.

23. How many one night stands in this last year?
zero.

24. What was your favorite TV program(s)?
northern exposure, sex and the city (thanks netflix!), the o.c., grey's anatomy, project runway.

25. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?
i can't think of anyone that i *hate*

26. What was the best book(s) you read?
so many, so many... but probably the tipping point and confessions of an ugly stepsister

27. What was your greatest musical discovery?
wolf parade (thanks aaron!)

28. What did you want and get?
a great new job, a blackberry, a new computer,

29. What did you want and not get?
plenty of things that weren't tangible anyway.

30. What were your favorite films of this year?
the big lebowski (this year and last year and last year...). i didn't see too many new movies this year.

31. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
i don't remember what i did *on* my birthday, but i had my birthday dinner (early) at zola, one of my favorite places, and i turned 24 (jan 25)

32. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
having saved more money and/or paid off more debt.

33. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2005?
simple, classic, with great shoes, minimal accessories and a few "fashionable" pieces thrown in.

34. What kept you sane?
wine. and michael. =)

35. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
i have an odd fascination with lindsay lohan (to my credit, it started around the time of 'mean girls' - before she went all skinny and party girl)...

36. What political issue stirred you the most?
definately the mess surrounding hurricane katrina. it's chaos at the federal level, the state level, and the local level.

37. Who did you miss?
friends and family in arkansas.

38. Who was the best new person (people) you met?
i didn't meet him in 2005, but my friendship with jake over the last year has been pretty great.

39. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2005.
when you need to talk to someone, pick up the phone.

40. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year?
from 'the good times are killing me' (modest mouse)

got dirt, got air, got water and i know you can carry on.
shrug off shortsighted false excitement and oh what can i say?
have one, have twenty more "one mores" and oh it does not relent.

the good times are killing me . modest mouse

a million miles ago, you seem

2005-12-07T23:18:00.000-05:00

i've spent a lot of time over the last few days thinking about where i was this time last year. while breaking a bone isn't a particularly life-altering event, it certainly defined most of this past year. the year was broken into pretty distinct segments, and they correlate directly with the status of my ankle. first, we had the post-surgery-on-crutches phase, then the physical therapy phase, then the second surgery phase, then the second-recovery phase (essentially april-august), then the finally-seeing-some-progress phase. i can relate just about everything that has happened over the last year to the status of my ankle.

i'm not one for new year's resolutions - the whole new year thing has never really resonated with me. i don't feel older, i don't feel any different, and i've never been one for serious new year's partying. i don't take it as an opportunity to reflect or to predict or to do much of anything really. but as i've embarked on this journey of recalling the last year, i can't help but to wonder where i'll be this time next year, or what will resonate with me next year about today and this coming year. maybe, for me, december 7 will be the turning of a new stone every year, much like january 1 is for many people.

sun kil moon . carry me ohio

if the snow buries my neighboorhood...

2005-12-06T10:21:00.000-05:00

a year ago sunday, i broke my ankle while sprinting down an escalator. a year ago tomorrow, i had 4 screws (screws - not pins) inserted into the aforementioned ankle. i had a check-up with the surgeon this morning, and things are finally looking up. i've made quite a bit of progress in the last few months - when i visited him in august i could only run about 1/4 mile before my ankle starting hurting too bad. now i can run closer to two miles. i've still got some tenderness and tightness, but even a year later, i'm still making progress.

the district saw its first winter storm yesterday (we were originally forecasted to get around 8 inches of snow. i think it's closer to two), and michael and i put up a christmas tree and wrapped a present! i guess winter has really arrived...

the arcade fire . neighborhood #1 (tunnels)

2005-12-03T13:18:00.000-05:00

Mmm, I am Lemon Flavoured.

I am bitter and twisted. Expect from me acerbic humour and sharp commentary. While I may seem nasty at first, I'm actually quite good company if I like you, so long as you don't mind a bit of cutting to the chase. What Flavour Are You?

i'm not in love with the modern world

2005-11-30T18:08:00.000-05:00

but i am in love with this shelf...

wolf parade . modern world

looking kind of anxious in your cross-armed stance

2005-11-25T20:26:00.000-05:00

time magazine's cover story this week begins, "new orleans today: it's worse than you think." i'm not one to disagree with the likes of time magazine. if they say it's worse than you think, it must be worse than you think.

i can't begin to describe how bad it is. the french quarter is largely intact, and it's actually pretty active (thanks to all the police, reporters, etc who are calling its hotels home). the bars are thumping at night, though the crowds aren't what they used to be. for one, they're a little smaller; for another, there are no women to be found. lively bar scene. yea.

the rest of the city, though... the rest of the city. we were fortunate (?) enough to have a bus tour around the city with the mayor (police escort and all). let me first say that i felt like a TOTAL FRAUD touring new orleans from the comfort of a bus. watching people trying to pick up their lives (the few that were) while being distracted by tons of loud sirens and yet another tour group was nothing short of embarrassing.

i've already posted a link to the photos on flickr (where i'll be hosting my photos from now on), but, really, what's another set of pictures? i look at them a week later, and already the raw emotion that went along with them is dissipating.

almost no one is rebuilding. most people are just waiting - and most of them aren't waiting in new orleans. they're waiting in one of the 44 states that they've called home for the last three months, and they're relying on the media to tell them anything about new orleans because they can't get in touch with anyone down there, and fema can't give city officials in new orleans any information about where its citizens are (and fema is the only group that knows). it's just a total disaster. our meeting was with the mayor, the city council president, and the lt. governor, and it was the first time the three of them had been in the room together since the hurricane hit (they're also all three planning to run for mayor. the election is supposed to be this spring, but considering the city has very few citizens...).

the city will never be the same - that's a given. the hurricane has already become part of the culture. parts of the city will be rebuilt and other parts will not. despite efforts to "preserve each of the 70 neighborhoods in new orleans," the city will evolve. already, there is a huge influx of hispanic workers - a demographic largely absent before katrina. some people will come, some people will not return, and the city will keep breathing, as cities have always done.

modest mouse . talking shit about a pretty sunset

katrina, the big easy, and the gulf coast

2005-11-19T18:03:00.000-05:00

i've just returned from a trip down to the devastated areas of the gulf coast. i'll write more about it later, but for now you can view the photos on flickr.

all i can say now is that it was so much worse than i imagined it could possibly be.

pucci and payless

2005-11-19T17:59:00.000-05:00

a few days after buying my first pair of couture shoes (pucci, on sale), i found these fabulous kicks at payless:

i don't discriminate.

a new member of the family

2005-11-02T21:02:00.000-05:00

welcome baby compy.

2005-10-31T20:18:00.000-05:00

what is it about halloween that makes otherwise sane girls want to dress up like sluts?

heaven is a cabin named 'columbine'

2005-10-29T07:50:00.000-04:00

so, i'm in montana in the middle of NO WHERE. we have no phones, no televisions, and lots of flashlights. notice, however, that we do have wireless internet. god bless this country.

normally, being in the middle of no where isn't an issue for me. i grew up in ARKANSAS. and, more so than that, i grew up camping nearly every weekend (running water only, please). i didn't flinch when they told us there were no tv's or locks on the cabin doors (though my favorite jersey girl absolutely freaked out. there's nothing funnier than a jersey accent freaking out); i could dig it. who knows, i might even RELAX and SLEEP a bit during this 'retreat.'

well, this meeting actually started a few days before i got here, and, let me tell you, everyone else is REALLY RELAXED. so relaxed that they're VERY ready to get back to the cities they never really wanted to leave in the first place.

sample quotes overheard by the 'leaders' of the architecture profession:

"i don't want to drink port with old men"
"there are several architecture faculty i'd like to see nude"
"do you mind if i entertain you all the way home by reading my spam aloud?"
"good job. now there's going to be a bear who gets gum stuck between his balls"
"we're about two nights away from campfire songs"
"i'm SO GOD DAMN WELL RESTED"

2005-10-29T07:48:00.000-04:00

borf is alive in boston!

2005-10-27T11:43:00.000-04:00

perhaps it's just the rain

2005-10-26T16:37:00.000-04:00

I'm weary to the bone, and it seems like every day is like this. True, I'm traveling - right now at the cleveland airport, on my way back to dc from boston, only to turn around tomorrow for a several day trip to montana. But it's more than that, and I can't put my finger on it. Work is engaging and inspiring, the brisk wind of fall keeps my mind clear, and home is cozy, but something isn't quite right. I feel like I could sleep for days.

i guess that bastard* was right

2005-10-21T19:02:00.000-04:00

apparently "it's only a matter of time" meant "it's only matter of time until someone steals your fucking* bike"

motherfuckers*

it was chained to a post. i wasn't even being irresponsible. IT WAS MY BIKE! MINE!

i feel so violated.

*yes, i've been cursing more on my blog. it's my blog. i can do that.

that's right...

2005-10-13T19:54:00.000-04:00

not only was today my last day at work, but now I'm sitting on a train updating my blog from my NEW BLACKBERRY!

the life of an urban biker

2005-10-12T21:42:00.000-04:00

as referenced in a previous blog entry (i'm too lazy to look it up and link it), i've started riding my bike to work every day. granted, i've been traveling a lot lately, but i still ride my bike to work most of the time (also, in the interest of full disclosure, it's MUCH easier/faster for me to bike to work than it is for me to walk and/or take the metro).

i ride down one of the busiest streets in DC every day. it's streaming with busses and traffic and is 5 lanes and is a nightmare to maneuver. i often get into fights with car drivers because IN DC BIKERS HAVE THE LEGAL RIGHT TO TAKE THE LANE. i don't have road rage, i simply KNOW THE LAW.

so yesterday, in typical trinity fashion, i angled my arm out to the side and took the left lane in preparation for a turn. the driver behind me yelled "it's only a matter of time!" to which i responded by nearly breaking out into tears. and i wasn't even pms'ing! it really bothered me! asshole.

so i made up for it this morning. while making my usual transition from h street to new york street, this car started honking at me pretty incessantly. i looked back a few times with an angry glare thinking the whole time that the BIKER IN DC HAS THE RIGHT TO TAKE THE LANE, but she wouldn't stop. to make matters worse i HADN'T EVEN TAKEN THE LANE, i was pretty much ON the sidewalk. so, of course, when i passed her later i yelled into her open window 'what good did that do you, you stupid bitch'

it's only a matter of time...

i forgot where i was going with this...

2005-10-10T12:28:00.000-04:00

in all of my bragging yesterday (sorry about that. i get carried away sometimes), i forgot the real reason i was writing.

to pick up where i left off:

so, i was an avid athlete in high school. i had solid 6pack abs and loved every minute of it (oh, shit, i forgot i was going to stop the bragging). needless to say, i was unable to keep up with this routine in architecture school, and i slowly slipped into bad habits of eating junk food and not working out (and not washing my hair and not wearing makeup and not sleeping, but that's beside the point). i never "worked out" in high school (except lifting weights for track. and doing situps and pushups for track. i used to have to do 200 inclined situps a day during pole vaulting season. shit. that bragging thing again.), i simply went to practice. i'd say that's been the hardest transition for me - going from the mentality of doing something i love to do to doing something because it's good for me and i probably should. there were times in college when i would stick to a workout routine (like when candi (hi candi!) and i used to go running every morning at 6:45 in rome. jena (hi jena!) went running with us for awhile. until she threw her shoes away) and other times when i would sit at home and eat rice crispy treats (i LOVE rice crispy treats). through most of college my weight stayed pretty steady (around 10lbs more than my high school weight), but weight isn't really the issue. i'm more concerned with being healthy and feeling good.

fastforward to now. this last year was really tough on me. i was traveling constantly, working out sporadically, and eating REALLY good food at nearly every meeting i went to. i felt tired most of the time and just generally blah. breaking my ankle put another damper on fitness, as i went nearly 10 months not physically being able to run (and i, sickeningly, LOVE to run).

so, i've resolved to get back into shape. i mean REALLY get back into shape. i'm talking 6pack into shape. i'm running again, lifting weights, eating healthy, and it feels great. well, it FELT great. until yesterday. deciding to take it up a notch, i thought it would be a good idea to run up and down 14 flights of stairs for 30 minutes (and if you make a SINGLE comment about how i broke my ankle, i'll kill you). i'm so sore today that i can hardly walk. this is like 'first day of soccer practice sore' or 'first time learning a back twisting lay-out sore.' i'm REALLY fucking sore. =(

warning: incessant bragging masked as reminiscing ahead

2005-10-09T18:21:00.000-04:00

most of my loyal readers know i was once an avid athlete. i wear this title as a badge of honor, and i rarely let an opportunity to tell others about my athletic history pass. i'm not sure why i still feel the need to be so competitive about past feats, but it's who i am, and i'm not really interested in changing that.

back in the days, i was a soccer player, a gymnast, and a competitive track athlete (i was also a cheerleader for a time, but please don't hold that against me). i still don't know how i juggled these sports, my grades, and a social life (oh wait, i didn't have that last one), but i'm fairly certain it had to do with the fact that my parents never once suggested that i get an after-school job. thanks guys.

since the gymnastics facility was an hour away from my house, there were many days each week when i wouldn't get home until after 10pm, only to have a load of homework in front of me. seems like soccer practices, games, and track meets were the same way, but i could probably still do the gymnastics drive with my eyes closed. i'm sure i'd still instinctively slow down around dubach, la to avoid the inevitable cop car sitting in the carwash parking lot. the most vivid memory of this life is not the time first time i scored a hat trick or landed my first layout stepout on the balance beam or qualified for state in the pole vault. nope, the most vivid memory is the taste of salt streaming off my face after the first blast of a cold water shower. but, hold on: i must add this - that game where i scored a hat trick in front of a home crowd WAS the game when i knew the relationship with my high school sweetheart was over. after the game, i ran out of the locker room estatic to see him, only to be greeted by 'wait here for just a second' and to see him walk past me to talk to my DAD! it wasn't 'hey, let's go meet your dad, i need to tell him something. it was 'you stay here, and i'll go talk to your dad and come back to get you when i get done.' THAT was a healthy relationship.

yours is the only version of my desertion that I could ever subscribe to

2005-10-08T22:02:00.000-04:00

it all started innocently enough. michael picked me up from the airport in memphis in december of 2002. i was returning from half a year in europe, and christmas was two days away. i was able to sleep on my flight from rome to newark, but a six hour layover there had me pretty wiped out. we began the 5 hour drive from memphis at around 7pm in the formidable acura legend. he presented me with a cinnamon roll at the airport, assuming i would be hungry and that i liked cinnamon rolls - neither of which turned out to be true. i think he secretly wanted that cinnamon roll. but that's neither here nor there.

my love affair with interpol began that night. we listened to 'turn on the bright lights' the entire way home (all the way through each time, incase you're wondering). the music is dark, moody, and stunning. themes range from love to loneliness to infidelity, and it's aching without being emo. it screams of a cold new york winter, and i can't get it out of my head. three years later, i can safely say, without being crass, it's my favorite album.

interpol . pda

template problems

2005-10-08T13:22:00.000-04:00

my template only seems to display correctly on internet explorer (everyone's favorite browser!), so unless someone can help me get this to work with mozilla and safari, i'm going to be forced to switch back to an older blog format. =(

he's a martyr with a wide rope

2005-10-06T15:27:00.000-04:00

i've been awfully bored lately. my music has gotten boring, my workout routine has gotten boring, the tv shows i like have gotten boring: things just aren't that interesting around here. i started last week digging up my old music and reliving the first few years of architecture school. pavement's 'i need to sleep' was practically my theme song during de noble's studio in second year. i would listen to it over and over again while building models well into the night.

speaking of, err, i mean not to change the subject completely, but i've got a little beef with this whole 'being married' thing. it's great, don't get me wrong, but our methods of listening to music totally clash, and his is wrong. there's a right way and a wrong way to listen to music, and mine is right (of course). michael INSISTS on always listening to music IN ORDER. he wants to listen to a CD from the very first song to the very last song, and doesn't like listening to it if even one song has a skip or something. before itunes, he didn't even like to listen to burnt cd's. GET OVER IT, HONEY. i, for one, like to listen to the same song over and over and over again. i could listen to the same song 15 times if it's what i was in the mood for. also, my itunes and ipod are ALWAYS on shuffle (that is, if it isn't on repeat to hear the same song over and over and over again); i rarely ever listen to a cd all the way through (who has the patience for that?).

i listened to this song about 20 times while cleaning the kitchen a few days ago (yes, it took me about an hour to clean the kitchen, and no, michael wasn't home. do you really think he would have let me listen to a song that many times? or clean the kitchen for an hour without trying to distract me?).

shannon wright . william's alabama

wait for it... wait for it...

2005-10-04T09:25:00.000-04:00

i gave my resignation at work yesterday.

i know.

it's crazy.

but, trinity, you just started your new job.

i know.

and you wrote the job description.

i know.

i got the most incredible job offer, and i couldn't turn it down. and things weren't working out like i thought they would at my current job. the details aren't really important; what's important is that i'm really happy and excited to start my new job in two weeks.

what will you be doing in your new job?

well, i'll be working for a non-profit that is federally funded by the national endowment for the arts. the group works with mayors and design professionals to help mayors make educated, informed decisions regarding city planning in their communities. it's a really small office, so i'll be doing a little bit of everything (when i start, we'll have two people). i can't wait.

stay tuned for a big announcement tomorrow...

2005-10-02T16:35:00.000-04:00

it seems as though there is a building across from mine that's on fire right now. i can't tell for sure, but there's some pretty thick black smoke billowing out of it right now (i know, i know, you're thinking that i've gotten really desperate for blog entries if i'm tuning in to write about a building that's on fire. you're pretty much right). we don't have renter's insurance. a fire would suck. it smells like rice crispy treats in here.

last week in san antonio, i was in a sound drunken sleep at around 2:00am when the fire alarm started blaring. being in the sound drunken sleep i was in, it took a good minute to figure out what the hell the noise was. my sound logic told me it was the alarm clock, but after banging on that for another minute, realizing there must be fault in that logic, i eyed the smoke detector. next thing i know, i'm standing on the bed, pounding on the smoke detector, trying to rip it out of the wall. that must have been the official point that i 'woke up' because i decided right then that this MUST be a false alarm, so i crawled back into bed and put a pillow over my head. i think i went back to sleep before the alarm stopped.

central park at dusk

2005-10-01T12:17:00.000-04:00

autumn in new york?

2005-09-28T15:04:00.000-04:00

all summer long i've been praying for fall. the person who looked forward to summer her whole life has been changed by this thing we call 'winter' in dc (which, i was reminded yesterday, is not the same thing people from minnesota call 'winter'). though i'm from the south and still consider myself a southerner, i've come to the realization that leaving my apartment and getting blasted with a frigid gust of wind has really become one of my only moments of true meditation. perhaps this shift from the love of summer to the love of winter is more related to this capability of meditation. when i was a child, summer was synonymous with long weekends on the ski-boat. even now, the thought of sitting in the front seat of the boat and flying over the lake with the wind blowing across my face instantly calms and rejuvinates me; well, that, and dipping my sunburnt face into the water and holding by breath and then blowing out for as long as i could.

san antonio was no problem - we didn't even get any rain. my flights out on sunday were pretty seamless, so no complaints. i'm in new york for a few days. i was asked to moderate a panel discussion at the center for architecture here on monday night and am otherwise visting schools in the area. fall is rapidly approaching - if you can't tell by the few stray leaves on the ground, you can definately tell by the haste with which new yorkers embrace fall fashion.

change is right around the corner...

sigur ros . svefn g englar

post 100 : major hurricane pt. 2

2005-09-22T05:07:00.000-04:00

well, for weeks now i've been drafting out the 100th post to my blog. in typical trinity fashion, i'm no where near being finished, and i think it's time for an update.

i'm sitting at la guardia about to board a flight for san antonio, where i'll be all weekend. i'm worried about hurricane rita, and though i've been told that people are being evacuated *to* san antonio, i'm still not feeling very secure about this. perhaps it won't be too severe in san antonio, but i have a feeling it'll be nearly impossible to get out of there on sunday (despite being one of continental's 'most valuable customers'). *sigh*

i'll do my best to keep in touch.

time for you to go out to the places you will be from

2005-08-27T19:20:00.000-04:00

disclaimer: for those of you who read ArchVoices, i totally had this entry drafted before they released their edition friday.

well, i'm back in arkansas - certainly not where i thought i'd be, but definately where i need to be right now. being back here always leaves me melancholy and distant; sometimes i'm not even sure i can drag up the memories of this place. for the most part all that's left is the vague feeling of the typical drama associated with high school and the smell of chemical plants. it's a place i'll never again associate with 'home.'

i'm currently sans ipod (it isn't broken this time; i just left it with a friend and haven't gotten it back yet), so on the long ride from the airport to here, i turned the radio up as loud as i could and sang along (something which is hard to do in DC since i don't have a car). i haven't listened to the radio in years, so most of the time was spent on scan mode, but the songs i ended up hearing seemed to define my memories of arkansas. nothing says "welcome to the south" like 'sweet home alabama' (yes, i know DC is technically south of the mason-dixon line, but it's really a different world), and nothing reminds me more of summers on the lake in the ski-boat like garth brooks' 'rodeo.' and with the exception of sarah mclachlan's 'i will remember you,' nothing reminds me more of those last few months of high school like semisonic's 'closing time.' it's cliche, but it's amazing how a song can really encapsulate a moment in time.

semisonic . closing time

the close of a chapter

2005-07-29T20:36:00.000-04:00

The last week has been a rough one for me (not exactly true - the week before that was the rough one, but i haven't updated my blog to tell you about it). Last Wednesday and Thursday the 2004-2005 AIAS Board of Directors met for the final time. We closed the meeting with the turnover of leadership and then proceeded into our 3 day annual leadership conference, Grassroots. The board meeting was emotional for many reasons, primarly because it marked the end of what has certainly been the most incredible experience of my life thus far - serving as the AIAS National Vice President (secretary and treasurer). For those of you who don't know, I was elected into this position by our 6,000 members in January of 2004 and began serving around this time last year. The National VP is a full-time paid position in our national office in Washington DC. After graduation, I packed up and moved from Fayetteville, AR to downtown DC and began my first "real job." I also got married and lived for a very brief (but awful) time in Ghetto, Maryland.

So, it's all over. The Board meeting was also emotional because we could clearly see the hard work that we'd done over the year pay off pretty dramatically. To be overly simplistic, our year was spent advocating for architecture students (primarily hosting the Studio Culture Summit) and internally restructuring our organization. Following years of debate and discussion, we compiled the very first operating plan for the AIAS and restructured our governing documents. In addition, we hired a full-time staff person to grow and develop our community service initiative, Freedom by Design and to help support our local chapters. In a matter of about 20 minutes at the end of the Board meeting we approved the operating plan, the governing documents, and the 2005-2006 budget. With just a few "aye's," all of our work was finally formally in place. It felt so good.

But it also marked the end of an experience that i truly cannot describe. My resume has grown by leaps and bounds, but more importantly, my entire perspective of the profession has been altered. It's no longer an elusive and forboding place; it's a place where i feel comfortable moving and am confident that the "people in charge" have the best interests of the general public and emerging professionals at heart. It's a great time to be a part of architecture. Sure, there are problems, but overall, it's exactly where i want to be.

Below is a list of highlights from the last year. Unfortunately, these are mostly very tangible highlights, because i can't describe to you the joy of knowing that the world is a better place for architecture students today than it was a year ago. I know it isn't the same as solving massive problems like global warming (why is it everyone recalls global warming in that context?), but it feels good none-the-less.

so, in no order (well, other than a rough timeline):
Board retreat at Mischa's parents cottage in northern Ontario
AIAS Grassroots as Vice President
AIA Education-Practice-Industry Connection Steering Committee meeting in Big Sky, MT
Driving from San Diego to Santa Cruz one afternoon in September along the Pacific Coast Highway
Serving on the ACSA Board
Freedom by Design Orientation Weekend in Denver, CO
Driving to the continental divide in an RV
Dinner at the Capital Grille with the FBD team
Raising $30,000 in a month for the Studio Culture Summit
Hosting the Studio Culture Summit in Minneapolis, MN
Being in Texas on Election Day (at least it was Austin)
Hosting a panel discussion on Student Centered Education in front of over 100 administrators in Houston
Doing a corn maze in Lubbock, TX
Dancing to the F-A-I-A (instead of the YMCA) at an AIA black-tie event
Shattering my ankle on December 4
Having ankle surgery on December 7
FORUM 2004 in New Orleans - on crutches
Roll Call - on crutches
The Vice Presidential Step Stool (thanks UWM!)
Serving in numerous design juries
Watching Calatrava accept his Gold Medal at the National Building Museum
Serving as a member of the Internship Conference Advisory Committee
Physical therapy (and more physical therapy)
AIA Grassroots
Archvoices retreat in Dallas, TX
Touring design/build projects in Ruston, LA
Cookout in Starkville, MS
REALLY sketchy hotel near the Memphis airport
Touchdown jesus at Notre Dame
Sleeping on Matt's couch for a few days
Sleeping on more couches than hotel beds for the year (by a long shot)
ACSA conference in Chicago
Savannah quad conference
Los Angeles quad conference in the same weekend
University of Southern California NAAB visit
Being appointed to the NAAB Board
Costa Rica vacation!
Vegas, Baby
Introducing Calatrava at AIA Convention
Having Thom Mayne be jealous that Calatrava was speaking to 'the students' and he was not
Talking to regulators about internship - in Southbeach
NYC for Healthcare design awards jury
Ithaca is Gorges!
Dumbarton Oaks with the Board
Board retreat part 2: Jake's parent's place in Ocean City

Oh yea, and that staff position i was telling you about in the beginning? The one that is helping to develop Freedom by Design and helping to support our chapters? Well, that staff person is me. For a year at least. And maybe then i'll go try to be a "real intern"

borf is dead

2005-07-14T09:52:00.000-04:00

borf, the prolific dc tagger, was arrested yesterday. it's a sad day in the district...

washington post article

borf tags

let's all have another orange julius

2005-07-13T21:20:00.000-04:00

my mind is pretty blank tonight. numb maybe. maybe that's it. i'm not really sure. between work and travel and sleep, i haven't had much time to do anything interesting. i've been too stressed about my (immediate) future to just relax and enjoy myself a little. case in point: i just got back from a trip to nyc (see picture below) where i spent entirely too much time in my (really swanky) hotel room (my organization wasn't paying - don't worry). even in south beach a few weeks ago (see picture below the other picture), i had a really difficult time relaxing, and there are few things more relaxing than listening to an ocean. i could really use a vacation, but i've already taken one (costa rica, remember? still haven't posted pictures from that. sigh), and i can't really afford to just not work between jobs in august.

if anyone feels really sorry for me, a gift certificate for a spa day might really pick me up. that and a new messenger bag.

modest mouse . teeth like god's shoeshine

2005-07-13T20:54:00.000-04:00

2005-07-13T20:42:00.000-04:00

michael is drunk blogging again...

2005-07-09T20:45:00.000-04:00

make him happy and go look

wasting time

i could only make you cry with these words

2005-07-09T19:43:00.000-04:00

tisk tisk, bad trinity. yet again, i've been neglecting my blog. not only have i been neglecting my own blog, but i haven't been very good about reading other people's blogs either. bad trinity.
i've been REALLY BUSY at work lately. really. like, REALLY busy (i wonder how many times i can use "really" in a blog entry). on the plus side, i think i've got a job for august (3 WEEKS!), but it's not 100% official, so i can't say anything about it right now. let's just say that i (still) won't need to sign up for IDP yet. i want to be a registered architect. really. i just don't want to be an intern. considering it takes the average person 7.6 years, i'm not that far behind, right?

belle and sebastian . get me away from here, i'm dying

hell on earth?

2005-06-27T21:10:00.000-04:00

aka newark airport

i promise to commit no acts of violence

2005-06-21T21:17:00.000-04:00

for the last several weeks, i've been stalking craigslist for a "new" bike. i've actually been saying for over a year now that i really need a bike. well, a bike and a facial, but i guess the later will have to wait. as i'm incredibly vertically challenged, finding a bike that works has been really difficult, if not downright impossible (if i don't want a barbie bike, that is. and, dad, I DON'T WANT A BARBIE BIKE. STOP SAYING YOU WILL GET ME ONE FOR CHRISTMAS).

long story short, i bought a used 13" Trek 930 today. then i took it for a ride out to the airport and watched planes land for awhile. i rarely say this: what a great tuesday. maybe it's because it's really thursday for me, since tomorrow is my last day in the office this week. that must be it.

interpol . not even jail

project ORANGE : complete

2005-06-19T16:50:00.000-04:00

project ORANGE

2005-06-17T18:05:00.000-04:00

the actress is always breaking things

2005-06-16T14:55:00.000-04:00

an update on my life:

i like orange. can you tell? i think i'm going to paint my ceiling orange in the apartment.
we've officially renewed our lease on the apartment. expect more out the window shots for the next year.
yesterday i helped one of my successors move into his apartment. the 'new kids' will be kicking us out soon. what in the world am i going to do?
i don't know what i'm going to be doing in august.
i've gotten a few soft offers, but right now i really need to decide if i want to go into traditional practice or if i want to stick to this "community" side of our profession.
i should have been working on my portfolio this week instead of my new blog layout
but i didn't. i worked on the new blog layout.
i hope you like the new blog layout.
i've had 3 parts to a root canal and it still isn't finished.
i still can't run on my ankle, but it's getting better.
our pool finally opened.
what in the world am i going to be doing in august?
can someone find me a job?
i'm going to miami next weekend, and michael is actually going to be able to come with me. check out where we're staying
i only have 6 weeks left on my term, but i still have 3 trips and two conferences/meetings in DC before i'm done.
when will i find time to do REAL work?

pavement . date with ikea

new blog layout!

2005-06-15T17:00:00.000-04:00

as promised, i've finally got a beta version of my new blog layout up-and-running. be aware, there are a few kinks, and it'll probably be a few days before they're all worked out, but i really do hope you like it!

there was a time...

2005-06-09T17:36:00.000-04:00

when i didn't care about comments on my blog. nope, didn't care at all. i was blogging for me and only me (oh shut up, there's nothing more narcissistic than a blog) and didn't care who came to visit or read. that day has past. i'm leaving for san antonio this weekend, and when i get back there had better be comments on my blog.

someone out there cares, right?

UPDATE: in a fight with my computer and internet connection, i managed to mangle my template beyond recognition. please excuse the old one for awhile...

welcome candi!

2005-06-09T11:56:00.000-04:00

my friend candi has started her own blog. go check it out!

it's a lie to serve the truth

2005-06-07T10:12:00.000-04:00

location . locked in the office
temp . 76
humidity . 77%
conditions . humid

architecture satire at its best: check out gutter.curbed.com (not to be confused with their sister site, curbed:dot:gutter:dot:com).

blonde redhead . hated because of great qualities

think i'm drunk enough to drive you home now

2005-06-06T21:15:00.000-04:00

location . home
temp . 74
humidity . 87%
conditions . thunderstorm

i've spent most of the last two weeks in the wonderful world of tooth decay. for someone who's only ever had two cavities, this has been quite traumatic. it actually all started about eight months ago when i thought i cracked a filling, but i wasn't completely sure, and it only hurt for a few weeks, so i decided to do nothing about it. advance to right before vegas, biting into a chunk of chicken, and PAIN. PAIN. do you understand, it was PAIN. went to the dentist about two weeks ago and discovered my negligence had resulted in the need for a pretty serious root canal, one that even my highly regarded dentist didn't want to touch. so he referred me to an endontist...
advance to today, me calling to get an appointment with said endontist (yes, i KNOW it is two weeks after the first appt, and i should have called MUCH earlier. stop scolding me. stop, i say) who of course doesn't take my insurance. after consulting with both my dentist and the endontist it was clear that if i wanted a TOP QUALITY root canal, i'd better go ahead and fork over the $1200 up front and deal with insurance later. out of curiosity, i decided to call my insurance company to see "approximately" how much i could expect to get reiumbursed. the answer? an unapologetic "300 dollars." 300 DOLLARS! ARE YOU KIDDING ME? i can't afford a $900 root canal, and even if i could, i'd rather spend it on something like new clothes. or shoes. or another vacation. NOT A ROOT CANAL. mr. worlds-best-endontist is a little too good for me, apparently.
so i call for an endontist in-network. luckily, there's one only a few blocks from work (because i can't let a pesky thing like a root canal keep me from making the world a better place for architecture students), so i called him up, and the secretary asked me if i could come in RIGHT NOW. RIGHT NOW. like the guy has nothing to do RIGHT NOW. like he's sitting in his office with a drill in one hand and a grin on his face just WAITING for his next victim. so i said NO WAY, but i can totally come tomorrow.

death cab for cutie . champagne from a paper cup

sad song, last dance, and no one knows who the band was

2005-06-03T20:14:00.000-04:00

after nearly a year of searching, i believe i've finally found THE BEST restaurant in chinatown. i know you're all relieved. you'd think it wouldn't be that difficult, right? surely there are at least 5 restaurants competing for that title, and all you have to do is eat at all of them constantly before you find that one special dish, and you can proclaim a winner. instead, the fridge is filled with half-full take-out containers, the drawers filled with take-out menus, and us left less-than-impressed at just about everything we've tried. IT'S CHINATOWN. COME ON. there's no reason i should have to go all the way to georgetown (or adam's morgan or singapore bisto - mmmm singapore bistro...) for good asian food.
that all changed today. after a year of making fun of the name "cafe deli" for an asian restaurant, we decided to brave it. 30 minutes later with our bellies full of peanut chicken and garlic chicken, we proclaimed a winner. it didn't hurt that the place is DIRT CHEAP. nothing is dirt cheap in dc. basic take-out will always set you back at least $25. however, every single person that came in except for us ordered the lemon-grass curry (insert meat or tofu here). think they know something we don't? maybe that's lunch tomorrow...

modest mouse . baby blue sedan

eleven hundred miles is too far inside a car

2005-06-01T11:25:00.000-04:00

location . back in the district
temp . 74
humidity . 44%
conditions . cloudy

at my insistence, michael and i spent the entire weekend driving. i know that sounds impossible, and perhaps it is, but just to prove i'm not exaggerating (much), here is a break down of the weekend:
depart: friday @ 3:00pm
arrive: tuesday @ 1:00pm
total # of hours: 94 hours

time sleeping/in hotels: 44 hours
time at weddings/getting ready for weddings: 13 hours
time driving: 37 hours

ok, so that wasn't as revealing as i hoped it would be. but WE DROVE ALOT.

why all the driving, you ask? why not, i say. a good road trip is necessary every once in awhile. but everyone that knows me knows i prefer to fly, so that doesn't make much sense. hrpmh. i'll just tell you: we drove out to illinois for luke's wedding. you remember luke, don't you? luke-from-architecture-school-luke? luke was fun. i miss luke. but the wedding was great, very informal, very luke (and barb. very barb, too). after that, we drove another 4 hours to columbia, missouri to attend a wedding of some friends of michael's. in a really strange coincidence, there were about 10 people who were at BOTH weddings... some people that were friends with luke and friends with the wife of michael's friend.

modest mouse . a life of artic sounds

it's not me, i am pretending

2005-05-26T21:40:00.000-04:00

location . vanilla drop martini and the oc
temp . 74
humidity . 42%
conditions . summer around the corner

yet again, i've been neglecting my blog. bad trinity. bad, bad trinity. on top of that, my last entry kind of made my parents look bad, and while i'm not one to apologize for what i write on my blog, i should make it clear that my parents were (ARE) really good parents and blah, blah, blah, BUT my most traumatic childhood moment WAS that soccer game. even though my dad will tell you that it wasn't his fault and that our other coach played dirty. uh huh. all i know is that for the rest of my soccer career i took getting called off the field personally.
my life has been an absolute horror for the last month. my ipod died. i know, i know, but there's nothing you can say that will console me. it died a slow, painful death, and it was even more painful watching it. first the skipped songs, then the you-can-only-load-334-songs-on-me-or-i'll-blow-up stage, then finally the folder and exclamation point of death. oh, the horror. it came to it's final resting place today: the apple store. i don't know that i will ever love my new ipod like i loved the first. but i'll try.

cat power . he turns down

they ought to drown him in holy water

2005-05-13T14:48:00.000-04:00

location . headphones at work
temp . 61
humidity . 53%
conditions . no one's wise enough to turn this ancient boat around

looks like i'm still crisp like fried chicken. only, it's all peeling off. somehow it's still crispy. this doesn't make much sense. you'd think i would be used to sunburns by now. or at least have skin cancer, COME ON.
see, my parents (bless them, hi mom and dad) thought that buying a ski boat when 'us kids' were young was a BRILLIANT idea. i have to admit, i was a pretty cute little youngster with my ski's tied together. i was an even cuter 3rd grader with my very own slalom ski. some of my best memories from childhood revolve around that ski boat (my very worst memory revolves around that year my dad was my soccer coach on an all-boys team, and he was going to start me in the game, but he had 12 people on the field, and who did he call off? ME! that's right! HIS OWN DAUGHTER). sunburns were a weekly occurrence, but none were as bad as that FIRST trip in the boat. i'm not sure what was distracting my parents (beer?), but NO sunscreen was applied to either myself or tristan. as it was mother's day weekend, we had to go to school the next day, and i remember being called into the principal's office to discuss if my parents were being negligent and if they needed to call child services... BET YOU DIDN'T KNOW THAT MOM AND DAD!

the shins . mine's not a high horse

costa rica recap

2005-05-12T11:49:00.000-04:00

as i've finally made it back from costa rica, had time to 'settle back in', and am starting to organize my photographs for posting, i've been, once again, neglecting my blog. i'm so sorry blog. please forgive me.

here are a few highlights from the trip

watching monkeys play in the rainforest
watching monkeys play in people's front yards
riding a zipline 200ft above the rainforest floor
doing a tarzan swing
making my own ceasar salad (dressing, too) in a restaurant
watching michael make banana's foster in a restuarant
what $16 will get you for a hotel room in san jose
toucans on the side of the road
a spur of the moment hike to a waterfall
night hikes in the rainforest
porcupines living in a fig strangler
tarantulas hiding in every crevice you can imagine
click beetles
hot springs
hot springs so hot you can't touch them
a volcano, with real lava
lava
lava streaming down the volcano
rosa, coco, and america (all parrots living near a bus stop)
what $40 will get you for a cabin on the beach
playa samara
surfing with my leash leg leading (i couldn't leash it because of my ankle)
HUGE waves
sunsets on the pacific in what you swear should be the northeast
intense soccer games on the beach in low tide
kayaking to an island in the hot, burning sun
spending three hours on open sea in the hot, burning sun
not being able to move for the next three days because of the sunburn
laying in a hammock drinking beer because you can't move
laying in your room drinking beer because you can't move
spending your 1 year anniversary unable to move
michael speaking spanish and trinity understanding it

the next 5 days

2005-05-04T15:02:00.000-04:00

costa rica pt 2

2005-05-03T18:05:00.000-04:00

day five in costa rica.

who said this is a rain forest? it hasn't rained yet! i'm glad i didn't let that guy from rei outfitters sell me that $200 rain jacket. that would have been worthless.

so, to update, we spent nearly all day sunday at selvatura, which is right at the entrance of the santa elena reserve. on the skywalk we saw loads of wildlife, including monkeys playing in trees (i'm such a kid when it comes to monkeys), but the best part were the ziplines. especially the one that was like 400yds long and about 200 feet above the canopies. i had to pretend i was doing something else to avoid an absolute freak-out.

after planning the remainder of our trip yesterday, we hiked out to a really beautiful waterfall. unlike the tours at selvatura, these trails weren't well defined, and we had to use ropes to climb parts of it. that night, we took a guided tour through the rainforest and saw the most incredible fig strangler with porcupines living in it.

this morning we took a taxi/ferry to la fortuna, a city at the base of volcan arenal, a VERY active volcano. we were going to hike out to yet another beautiful waterfall this afternoon (this one with a swimming hole at the bottom), but girly trinity decided to visit and we instead spent the entire day at the baldi hot springs and spa. ahhhh... my skin feels so great.

live from monteverde

2005-04-30T15:37:00.000-04:00

day 2 in costa rica.

after arriving around noon, yesterday was spent in san jose. i don´t know if you can really call san jose a ¨city.¨ it´s more like south central los angeles, although slightly safer (just slightly). the guide book says if you´re wanting to get close to nature, then get out of san jose as fast as possible. that´s exactly what we did.

we left san jose around 6:30 this morning, and though the total trip to monteverde was only around 100 miles, it took nearly 6 hours. we´re staying at the cabanas los pinos, and they are absolutely adorable! i´ll post pics later.

anyway, sorry this post is really dull. our vacation hasn´t been terribly exciting yet (no luggage stolen by monkeys), but tomorrow we´re doing the canopy tours and ziplines, so hopefully i´ll have more then!

the next time the sun rises...

2005-04-28T13:17:00.000-04:00

continental flight 1102 with non-stop service from houston, tx to san jose, costa rica will be beginning its initial descent into the misty rainforest.

and somewhere over my walk to work yesterday and a mad hunt through rei outfitters, i realized I'M GOING TO COSTA RICA. and i've planned NOTHING. those who know me know this isn't a surprise. a friend remarked yesterday, after hearing that my flight will be leaving at 6:00am that i'll probably start packing around 2:00am. i wouldn't be surprised.

i should add that this trip was conceived only 2 weeks ago. there's no way i could have gotten malaria or hepatitis a shots in that amount of time (they wouldn't be effective anyway). i could, however, have called my surgeon before YESTERDAY to tell him i'll be hiking in the rainforest in 48 hours, and, oh, by the way, do you think my ankle can handle it? what about surfing?

wish me luck! i'll be back on the 9th!

the horror!

2005-04-26T20:58:00.000-04:00

i just realized i'm going to be in costa rica on sunday. you know, SUNDAY.

FAMILY GUY is back on sunday.

maybe i can change the plane tickets...

why can't we just look the other way?

2005-04-25T17:57:00.000-04:00

location . on the bed
temp . 64
humidity . 30%
conditions . weather.com says mostly cloudy. my eyes see no clouds

i guess i've been about as bad as everyone else in not updating my blog. call it spring fever, laziness, whatever: i just haven't been in the mood to write about my daily existence. i used to analyze my day-to-day activities looking for something blog-worthy, then compose the entry in my head, and look for the perfect song and photo, and post just as soon as i got home from work. not that my entries were GOOD because of it; they'd just been pondered over and over-analyzed, that's all. *sigh* good, old-fashioned spring fever.

on a less dull note, i'm leaving friday for a 10-day trip to costa rica. call it my honeymoon, a vacation, whatever: i NEED to use my passport. it's getting dusty.

interpol . evil

savannah - los angeles

2005-04-15T16:28:00.000-04:00

now boarding continental flight 1155 with non-stop servi....

2005-03-30T21:29:00.000-05:00

location . atlanta airport
temp . 68
humidity . 41%
conditions . people are wearing SHORTS

sitting in the airport on my way to savannah. it's going to be a long few days: i'm in savannah until saturday, then i fly to los angeles until thursday. for once, i couldn't pack everything i needed into a carry-on (i've been known to pack a 14 day trip into a carry-on) because of all the materials i have to have with me for the various conferences/events i'm attending. i'm dreading getting to savannah only to discover that my bag and all my suits and lots of my favorite shoes are somewhere over the pacific. but, hey, let's look on the bright side...
i'm going to savannah! and then los angeles! two of my favorite places! in a week!

i'm not sure that i'll have access to internet while i'm away, so ta-ta for now!

the calm before the storm

2005-03-30T14:39:00.000-05:00

at least i was a good cheerleader

2005-03-28T20:36:00.000-05:00

the laughter pours from under doors

2005-03-28T20:28:00.000-05:00

location . sheltered
temp . 50
humidity . 87%
conditions . the rain is clearing

soooo.... just as soon as i start talking about spring, it rains for several days straight. i even *tried* to get into the spirit. i bought a new spring bag and some new shoes, including my first pair of PINK SHOES. PINK. I hate pink. and now i own a pair of pink shoes. see what spring does to people?

anyway, inspired by murrye and her mom, i've decided to share my most embarrasing moment. i'm not sure how it'll stack up: you guys can let me know.

8th Grade. Rogers Middle School. finally, we were 8th graders. just one more year until high school. one full year of being the oldest kids on campus. being the "cool" kids. i'd never say I was a "cool" kid, but I was a cheerleader that year (that's embarrasing enough to merit a most embarrasing story, right?), so cool or not, i was under a microscope. fastforward a few weeks to the first pep rally of the year. done with the fight song. done bringing the football team onto the gym floor. time for introductions of the cheerleading squad. never one to be ordinary, i decide to do a toe-touch immediately into a standing back tuck for my personal introduction. toe-touch fine. push off for back tuck. land ON MY STOMACH. in front of the WHOLE SCHOOL. and the WHOLE SCHOOL laughed hysterically.

years later, i occasionally get the "you're the cheerleader that......?"

bright eyes . haligh, haligh, haligh, a lie, haligh

life goes easy on me

2005-03-25T17:37:00.001-05:00

location . apt
temp . 46
humidity . 74%
conditions . good friday

i hate spring. there, i said it. i'm one of the few people you'll ever meet that doesn't have allergies that hates the spring. ok, maybe i don't *hate* the spring, but what i do hate is 1) unpredictable weather 2) pollen, even if i'm not allergic. it gets a green film on EVERYTHING 3) rain 4) spring clothes. i hate pastels. i think that's enough.

i like is/are 1) thunderstorms 2) the week of spring where the temperature is just right and a cool, crisp breeze is blowing (you know, the week between all the RAIN) 3) laughing at people wearing pastels. i hate pastels. did i mention that?

to commemorate closer being released on dvd... because people would rather watch porn at home than at the theater
damien rice . the blower's daughter

i'll thaw your foolish dreams away

2005-03-17T19:33:00.000-05:00

as i haven't been able to leave the apartment since my surgery, i don't have much new material. i mean, i could tell you about how i've watched eternal sunshine of the spotless mind and i heart huckabees, and oh my gosh the oc comes on tonight, but that's just boring, and i'm sure you're not interested in that at all. so, instead, i've decided to put up some wedding photos and reminisce about that very, very hectic time in my life. i mean, i was only graduating college, getting married, and moving to dc in a period of 5 DAYS. 5 DAYS! i should get offered a job because of that feat alone. if i can handle that, i can HANDLE ANYTHING. i also need a kick in the ass to get these photos online somewhere.

stephen malkmus . phantasies

dear god

2005-03-17T16:41:00.000-05:00

i promise i will never run down an escalator again. please stop punishing me.

thanks,
trinity